Down Time

Accepting my first-place trophy (and 100 dollars!) from a cute little kid

Since I have a few minutes to spare, I figured I'd spend my "down time" blogging. I know I haven't written anything in a while because my time has been nowhere near down.  Luckily though, even though I've been taking some time away from a ton of running, my race times have still been on the downward slope too, downward meaning faster, which, of course, is always an upper. 

Since I last posted, I have won two more races: the Shoreham Wading River Thanksgiving Day 5-Miler in 30:41 and Patchogue's Santa 5K Toy Trot in 18:30, where little kids (including the three little ones I babysit, since their mom was running too) lined up at the finish line and looked at me as if I was a superhero.  I don't plan to road race until January, so I figured this week, I'll enjoy some rest and easy miles. Even though my body doesn't ache for rest, I know it's perfect timing for a break, especially ending on a nice winning streak iced with commendable times and superhero experiences.

And speaking of commedable times, last Sunday, I was in no mood to run but prodded myself out of the door around 4 p.m., realizing that I would have to stay on illuminated pathways for my 13.1 miles.  I promised myself since I was feeling "blah" and unmotivated that I would enjoy the feel of the long run and avoid checking my watch.  I wandered through the Christmas-y streets of Patchogue, window shopping and checking out the Christmas lights on the Victorian homes.  The run was sweet, and it was even  more sweet when I finished the half-marathon and glanced at my watch to see that I completed my easy-going "stroll" in 1:36, a time that would rank pretty high in most actual races!

Later the next Saturday, I went with some of the girls to sign up for the Colgate Indoor Games, where I can potentially win $1,000 in scholarship money to pay off the rest of my student loans.  After registration, the girls and I went for a 5.5 mile run at Farmingdale College in a horse trail that I was so excited to find (one of my students let me in on the secret) and show off.  I especially love the riduclous hill you HAVE to climb in order to get onto any part of the trail.  After we finished a nice run while chatting, the girls commented that the change of pace and location was nice, just what they needed.  Me too, except then I had to leave them and dart back to a few extra hours of tutoring (on a Saturday - my choice)! 

Life has been pretty crazy.  The past week, I haven't been taking care of my body as well as I should.  I have been sleeping less, hydrating less, coffeeing up a little more, and eating on the go or not eating much (although I have eaten two chocolate filled donuts in the past week - YUM). In fact, I don't think I ate much before that Sunday run. I've been really slacking in that department. Obviously, none of these actions are congenial for running, but they work out well to help me survive the end-of-semseter home stretch.  My "down" time from running is actually an extremely hectic time for work.  I guess on the positive side, I don't have to worry about both at once. 

Another thing that is helping me through the semester and something I thought was going to be a downer was not coaching this winter season, but, in fact, I know it was a smart choice.  Honestly, I don't know how I squeezed coaching into this end-of-the-year madness.  I enjoy having a few moments to myself.  I miss some of the kids, but I, sadly, don't miss the craziness.

But once this craziness is over, I will REALLY have some down time, a full three-weeks off, which is why I can't complain too much.  My plans?  Some P90X in the morning, a free 10-day pass to L.A. Fitness to check out spin classes and their pool, some Bikram yoga, Real Ryder spin classes, maybe some Alter-G runs at Reddy-Care, some lifting in my basement, lots of mileage, a photo shoot with Citius, some research on a few free degrees I can get, and some time on my scrapbooks that are taking over my attic. 

Plus, I have to get ready for the Cherry Blossom 10-Miler in Washington, DC in April.  I just found out this week that I am an automatic seeded qualifier! Talk about feeling like a superhero!

Bascially, I guess I don't believe in being down. 

Superman

Last week was a good all-around week.  I felt like a professional runner and a really good teacher.  Each day, I did something that made myself proud.  In fact, on Wednesday, I had a stressful teacher day, filled with cramming in student conferences and last-minute paper grading, the story of my life!  On Wednesdays, I usually squeeze in an 8-mile run and a two-second shower on my 1.5 hour break during Post's common hour.  This Wednesday, I, sadly, had to forgo the run to get some grades done for my night class; on Wednesdays,  I teach from 8 a.m. to 9 p.m., with my run time and my drive time (from school to school) to separate the classes.  Needless to say, Wednesdays, like most of my days, are just exhausting.  The runs usually liven me up; this Wednesday, I had to rely on a pumpkin-spice latte instead.  

As I got to class, I heard one of my students, Mary (an older woman who has returned to school in pursuit of higher education who is involved with a family-owned music producing company), singing on her way to class.  I smiled as I headed in the same direction. When I got to my class, which is filled with totally amazing students that make my nights fun, I told them that Mary reminded me of how important it is to love the things that make us who we are and, more importantly, to share them.  

I proceeded by showing my students a video of the Alter-G, telling them about how exciting it was to get to run on on, and then, I showed them some of my running pictures.  In fact, one of my students, Judy, immediately complimented my legs: "Oh my God, you have such nice legs." I couldn't help but smile, remembering my old post a few weeks ago, about how I wanted to get that reaction at first glance from people. Mission accomplished!

After a pretty satisfying week, I had the chance to continue feeling like a professional runner on my trip to Saratoga Springs, a trip I had won through the New York State Parks Summer Series, a series of races over the summer in various state parks.  Rob and I traveled up to Saratoga, got caught in a ton of traffic, and ended up getting to the cool, old fashioned hotel at 3 a.m., just in time before the hotel front desk closed, phew.  

According to the itinerary that was sent to to the trip winners, a 5K race was scheduled for 9 a.m.  After waking up at 8 a.m., I thought twice about getting up and racing.  3-a.m. bedtimes don't work for me these days.  But, I heard happy chatter coming from below our hotel window, and after peering outside and seeing happy runners in tights, I had to gear up (in Citius gear) and get out there.  

Rob warmed up with me, and after our run, we couldn't find many people or the starting line.  We wandered back near the hotel, and I saw a familiar face of one of the Nassau officials and asked.  He glanced at his watch, laughed, and replied, we still have TWENTY minutes.  Ah, yes, Summer Series style, I almost forgot!  Rob and I stayed outside to stretch.  It was brisk but completely bearable. 

As we were stretching, Peter Hawkins, one of Long Island's finest wheelchair racers, came to us to ask us where the race was, the same question we still were asking ourselves.  We all laughed about the casualness of the race plan.  A little while later, after Rob announced he was only a spectator, Pete explained that the because of the cross country nature of the race, not conducive for his race chair, he would not be "running" either.  I toed the line and went off.

With no idea where I was going, I settled into third place and followed a guy through the course.  I felt effortless and quick.  After I was a little more confident in the course arrows, I moved into second and hunted for the male winner, as I was coaxed ("go get him!") by various runners on the trail.  I finished up in second place overall, first female, with a 18:42. (Goodbye 19, for good!) The course was hilly; terrain was rough, but it was beautiful.  Later, at dinner, Pete said watching Chris (the winner) and me run is beautiful.  I always say that I never feel more beautiful than when I run.  I hope my hubby thinks so too.  

After a cooldown with Rob, some breakfast and a shower, a day in Saratoga with one of our former Post teammates and his cute pregnant wife, tours and (gross) tastings of spring water from the natural springs in the park, and some shopping with awesome finds (12-dollar Nike tank top, new black boots!) while we were killing time before dinner, we went to the costume dinner in the ballroom.  So many people wore costumes, which created great icebreakers and conversation starters for the crowd.  Rob and I, of course, were immediately drawn to Superman, Pete.  I first saw his costume and laughed at his confident humor.  Later, he laughed at our table that some people thought Superman in a wheelchair was wrong, an insult for Christopher Reeve.  Pete had every right to wear that cape. 

For the next five or so hours, the three of us remained engrossed in conversations ranging from topics of traveling, running, drinking, relationships, swimming, politics.  Throughout the conversation, Pete slowly revealed how he became paralyzed and his process of becoming an elite racer, although he doesn't think he is "elite."  His story is incredible, heartbreaking, and absolutely inspirational.  There is nothing he can't do.

Funny enough, Pete and I talked about my new swimming challenges.  He agreed when I described the difficulty in breathing rhythmically in the pool.  Later, he described his own swimming lessons.  His trainer ties a buoy between his legs, exactly what Erin did to me when I was trying to learn.  He needed it to help lift his lower half to slice through the water; I needed it because I was a spaz lol.  

Later, I asked Pete about his entrance into wheelchair racing (he now travels the world doing marathons - and doing really well at them).  Pete began four years after his drunk driving accident.  He was injured at age 17, as a senior in high school, and wanted nothing to do with wheelchair racing.  Now, a few weeks ago, he was in Japan to race in a marathon.  He was in the elite field at the 2011 NYC Marathon just a few days ago.  

If you saw a headshot of Pete, you would immediately think "football player."  Rob said he looks like an ultimate fighter.  He is in incredible shape.  He also does not look his age (47), at all.  And, through conversation with Pete, yes, he was a football player, a linebacker, who says there is no feeling that can ever compare to the feeling of getting a good tackle.  As we talked about getting into racing, he explained that it immediately rekindled his competitive, athletic spirit that had been, what he had thought, broken when he was paralyzed. After his first race, where he finished second, he was driven to win again.  

Rob, although not in a wheelchair, usually says that he is "crippled" because of his years and years of painful injuries.  Pete and he immediately connected on this note of being an athlete and losing that incredible fire that comes from your passionate athletic pursuit.  (They also connected after they both turned away their salads, stating their disgust with anything "green.") Rob explained to Pete that he felt awful complaining to a man in a wheelchair about the problems with his legs, but Pete understood and urged him to start again, alone.  Part of Pete's explanation, that will forever resound in my ears, was that every single person at some point in their lives will have to face this fact, that they cannot perform the same way they used to.  For Pete, it was a lot earlier then he had hoped, and for Rob, he wasn't too far from Pete's injury-age when he was faced with this fear too.  For me, the end is evident; I just hope its really far away. Although Rob can count his blessings, I think he can also count on Pete as a new source of motivation. And I will count my own blessings; I am happy to have visibly (as per Judy) strong legs that carry me beautifully from start to finish.

I am so inspired after this weekend.  At several points of the weekend, we discussed the community of runners at the Boston Marathon, and here we were, with a whole community of runners, staying at one hotel, celebrating the weekend with each other.  These are my people: young and old, I watched runners, despite their ability levels, commune.  But by far, I am most inspired by Superman, for telling his story and for making his story part of Team Morris.  Like I said before, this week and weekend proved once again how important it is to love the things that make us who we are and how the act of sharing these items is what moves us forward.  And for a runner, there is nothing better than moving forward, our ultimate goal.

Alter-(OM)G

Ready for Takeoff!

Last Tuesday,  after I ran an hardcore solo workout of four mile repeats (5:32, 5:34, 5:38, 5:35), Team Citius had the opportunity of a lifetime: to run on an Alter-G tredmill.  This tredmill, for those who don't know, is a tredmill that can alter the gravitational pull on your body.  Basically, your lower body half is bubbled in, which allows you to control the weight of your body.  The machine is great for injured people, especially with stress fractures, because then they can run without the same amount of force on their bodies.  Most professional distance runners are also aware of the benefits of the Alter-G; they can up

their mileage without the same wear and tear on their bodies.  

Team Citius was like a bunch of little kids, glowing with excitement to play with a new toy, a new EXPENSIVE toy.  The Alter-G costs anywhere from 40K to 90K.  Despite the cost, I still want one and would highly consider selling my car and my husband's car to get one.  Just kidding (kinda)!

Each of us got about seven minutes to play on the cloud.  The feeling was so surreal.  After putting on spandex/wetsuit shorts, getting zippered into the contraption, and waiting for your bubble to fill up with air, slowly lifting your feet almost off the ground, you can start to go.  The people who worked at the facility laughed as each of us immediately jacked the tredmill up to 9 mph, noting that we were definitely "runners" because of how unafraid we were of acceleration.  

Running on the Alter-G

I started at 8.5 mph and gradually adjusted my body weight to 80%.  My legs moved effortlessly.  Actually, I could barely feel my legs moving because I felt so smooth.  The only reason I could tell my legs were working was the images from cameras that were positioned at several angles.  The video feed was shown right at the front of the tredmill so that I could see my form from various perspectives.  All I can say is that now I know what those Kenyans must feel like, because my stride looked ridiculously amazing!

After the tredmill, the facility used the Optojump computer program to analyze our running form and gait.  After watching my stride on a different tredmill, step by step, angle by angle, the therapist told me that fixing my stride would be a "piece of cake," that I had small issues to take care of.  For example, my left hip is a bit weaker than my right, and my left ankle could also use some strengthening.  What's funny is that I always thought my right side was weaker because my right side is the one that feels the most pain.  My right achilles makes popping noises and gets tight after long runs, and my right calf will feel more tight than my left.  

Piece of Cake Fixes!

I think it's funny that I believed that I had a discrepancy on the right side, but instead, the reason why this side hurts more is because it has the most stress on it and has to work a little harder. I think it's a good lesson to learn and to, literally, see for any life problem.  The stronger half overcompensates until it can no longer stand it.  A breakdown does not always mean a weakness; it simply means a strong overload.  I'll be sure to even these things out so that nothing breaks.  Where are those ankle weights?

As I ran my next workout, 4 miles of in/out 200s, a few days after the Alter-G experience, I thought carefully about my slower left side.  I consciously reminded myself to kick my left ankle up a little quicker than I am used to.  

In the pool on that same day, Coach Katherine told me how I was moving my arm over my head a little slower when I came up for air.  Obviously, I was slowing down because I was trying to give myself as much time "air" time as possible to take the precious breaths of air I now remember to take.  Just like my new ankle move, I manipulated my body to move my arm a little quicker, and guess what: I made the whole pool length.  I was so excited as I knew that this time I was going to make it all the way to the end without messing up! 

I guess the coolest part about my whole Alter-G (and pool) experience is that it really does put you on cloud 9.  The way the therapists were impressed at our running resumes, constantly using the word "elite" to describe us, and the high-tech experience that only "elite" runners usually get was awesome.  I have never felt more professional and am so thankful for Coach Vince for inviting me along, and even if we never get to float along on the miracle machine again, I know just the memory of this chance will help me get to my castles in the sky.

Team Citius: Vince Giambanco

Team Citius: Sam Snukis

Team Citius: Ryan Zillman

Thanks for making me a FIGHTER.



Citius



In the home stretch



Woo hoo check out my arm msucles!



So Sunday, November 6, I had the opportunity to race at the New England Club XC Championship race against a competitive field.  I went out in 5:39 and was out of contact with the lead pack, passed the 5K in 19:00, and finished the 6K in 22:13, slightly disappointed but accepting of the time considering my body felt like it was moving MUCH slower than it was.  At one point, I remember losing focus in the first 400 meters because Jenn Donnovan, yes, the girl I mentioned last post, the Suffolk phenom, was right in front of me and I took a moment to check her out.  I know, I know, I admit it.  I checked out a girl AND I lost focus in a race.  Why did I take that time to pause? To figure out what exactly she has that I don't - so that I can get it.  How can those little legs take her through the 6K course (and through the first damn mile) so fast? 

My husband can attest that I have been asking a lot of questions about my legs lately.  Take a look at the pictures above; my arms look manly.  I love it.  I literally have a "bulging bicep," but I don't have a picture of "holy shit" legs. Voila, a new obsession.  My husband has said several times, in response to my comments, that I clearly have runners' legs, but I want better runners' legs.  When my running buddy came to my house a few weeks ago, Rob's inital reaction was, WOAH, her legs are ripped.  What does she do? She spins. 

Today, thanks to the connection one of the Post girls has with a spin studio, I had the chance to have a free trial class on Real Ryder (?) spin bikes, the bikes that can lean as you move about.  It adds a whole new element to spinning, and I am always about upping the ante.  How can I make something hard harder?

I'm so glad I went.  Because of Veterans Day, I didn't have to babysit at 6 a.m. For most people, these extra few morning hours would be a perfect opportunity to catch up on some sleep.  For me, I rolled out of bed and into sneakers for this class.  Although, I will admit, I did consider texting the girls to tell them that I was going to opt out because, let's face it, who wants to get out of bed at 6 a.m. when she doesn't have to? But boy oh boy am I glad I did.  The class was amazing.

Funny enough, after the end of class, the instructor noted that she had "lost" me by the third song, that I had gone "in the zone."  And she's right, I found my own little focus as I stared at the muscle lines on my legs in the mirror (told you, obsession), fully aware at the progress I was making toward my goal.

Perhaps that third song, though, was Christina Aguilera's "Fighter," and maybe my zone was partially created by anger.  I couldn't help but listen to the words and take out the agression that I have built over the past two days.  After hearing rumors and confirmations of many of my athetes making extremely poor decisions, I cannot help but fume.  

I take things involving running and our team way too personally, but after always being the person to console the kids when they don't perform well and "just don't know why," I can't help but feel lied to.  You know why.  You ran a sub-par performance because you drank the weekend before your championship race.  You ran poorly because you drank THE DAY before your conference championships.  Here I am sitting for hours, reading food journals and researching different ailments and solutions, and there they are, lying to my face when I ask them to be honest.  I feel like so much of my time has been wasted, and I feel like I have been betrayed. 

I think the more and more I get into my own running, the less and less I get into coaching.  I look around at the girls who are faster than me and mimic them, so why then, don't our girls do that? It's frustrating. 

But I guess, with every uphill battle, there's a downhill waiting for you to cruise down.  On the positive side, their poor decisions make me stronger, make me work harder, make me wiser, make me a little bit faster, make my skin a little bit thicker, make me that much smarter. So to the people who are better than me and to the people who are no where near my level and never will be, thanks for making me a fighter.



Just Keep Swimming

I just love Friday Eve.

Why? Well, first off, the weekend is close, of course, but weekends in the Morris household usually entail even earlier wakeup calls than the weekday's morning alarm.  But these mornings usually involve a meet, which, for us running geeks, is worth the bags under our eyes.

But why I really love Thursday is because of how great it makes me feel.  I usually fit in about eight to ten miles, then, head into the pool with some of my athletes/friends to learn to swim.  Before practice, though, I was feeling tired and forgetful, remembering that I was a "goldfish," as Rob usually calls me since I forget everything he says within two seconds of him saying it, and did not bring the frisbee for practice as I promised (for those of you who don't know, goldfish have a memory span of about 30 seconds - don't cite me on that).

But then later on (amusing story actually) after hanging out with the coaching staff before a team game of ultimate frisbee (luckily we had a spare frisbee laying around - as all XC teams should), I decided to bail on the game (to avoid getting a black eye as one of our girls probably will have tomorrow) to begin my workout, and Rob reminded me of a missing Erin, a former athlete on the team who often comes back to practice after work to train but also often ends up falling asleep in her car and missing practice, even if she drove all the way from work to Post just to run with us.  Since this nap mishap has occurred several times, I decided to search for our beloved sleeping beauty via jogging around the parking lot and peering into random gold-colored cars and found her - passed out.

After a knock on the window and a laugh, I woke up Erin, who said, "Did I miss it??" (lol) Within ten minutes, she was up, out of the car, and ready to rock.  We warmed up two miles, planned our workout loop, and took off.  Although my legs are still feeling Tuesday's workout, I felt pretty fast through the first mile.  As I checked my watch and saw 5:35, I was psyched but a little worried about what the hill (Post Peak) was going to do to my speedy and sore hammys.  I concentrated on relaxing my breathing, looking good in front of the frisbee-ers, and bullying the hills on the course.  I ended the 2-ish-mile (we had to reroute a little because of a new soccer fence on our course) tempo run in 12:50. Solid.  Erin finished up in 14 and change.  Better than sleeping, I'd say!

But more exciting than my running workout, my swim workout was a.m.a.z.i.n.g.  I finally feel like I am "getting it."  I can breathe now, without taking in TOO much water like I used to.  I am absolutely determined to give Michael Phelps a run for his money, I guess a "swim" for his money (always thinking in running terms - oops).  I am even learning how to maneuver my body to streamline my glide through the water.  I actually think I am (can be) pretty quick too.

The girls made me swim a timed length (see, Katherine, I know my terms) of the pool to see "where I am at."  Although I slowed/stopped midway through the trial to spit out a gallon of water, I made it in 22 seconds.  I don't really know what that means, but I'm just glad that I wanted to keep going today.  And I would also like to add that even when I got close to the wall during my time trial, I pulled a "Phelps" (coining that term) and sacrificed a precious gulp of air to keep my head in the water longer and get to the wall faster (remember, 2008 Olympics). With all my random drills and attempts, I completed about 8 laps (with a lot of breaks for storytelling, gossiping, and laughing too).  Last week, I had to take breaks to breathe, so I count these moments as progression.

But I think the coolest part of these Thursdays is getting to show the girls my weakness and having them help me.  For me, it's humbling.  For them, I'm sure it's amusing.  I am seriously like a three-year-old learning all these new things, well, a three-year-old that listens intensely.  Each of my swimming coaches gives me feedback, new tips, and motivation as she cheers me on or cruises through the water herself.

Swimming with the girls also makes me a better coach.  Sometimes I forget how difficult it is to calm breathing down while running.  It's easy for me, hard for them.  Well, for these swimmer girls, this scenario is exactly the same thing.  They laugh (and fix me) when my head rockets of the water as I gasp for oxygen.  Breathing with water in your mouth, ear in the water, feet kicking wildly is easy for them, not so much for me. Like I said, it's humbling.  Likewise, it's inspiring.  They inspire me, and I am inspired by myself.  I have uncovered a weakness and need to get rid of it!

I never thought I'd be able to look like a pretty swimmer in the water, but now, after today, I am closer to that image.  And although I know I'll stick mostly to my pretty running, I know that since I am already a goldfish, I'll just keep swimming too.

Magic

Today has been the first day that I've felt sore since my half marathon.  I'm excited.  A while back, when my legs were sore, I would be concerned.  Now, I feel awesome that I've created the soreness in some fabulous way, which usually entails some hardcore miles.  Yesterday at practice, the team ran mile repeats: two...fast.  I did one with the gals, one on my own, and I'm ecstatic to report that I cruised my first one, and even had enough breath to cheer on the girls, in a 5:16, which is definitely faster than I ran in my college days. My second (solo) mile after a five-minute recovery was 5:23.  Although it felt a little harder, as expected, I know if I had someone to run with, it probably would have been faster.

Speaking of having someone to run with, I'm disappointed that both of my Citius girls bailed on me today, for valid reasons, of course.  I ran my eight miles today solo, which I have been doing mostly all fall, but I was hoping for a buddy to pull my tired hamstrings along a little quicker.  I'm also happy to report that I ran my 8 miles in 61 minutes and was sad that it was so slow. I picked a lot of hills, so I suppose I should be okay with the slower pace, but again, I know if I had someone there, I'd probably had cruised a 57-minute run, chatting about boyfriends, husbands, work, and weekend plans, oh yes, and races. 

I'm happy to see a change in my mentality when it comes to running in general.  I've fully embraced getting better than I have ever been, which includes eating better, sleeping more, adding extra exercises, embracing teammates, finding faster races, setting goals that seem a bit too far away (my castles in the clouds), and expecting fast times.

In fact, this weekend, I've signed up for a pretty competitive race in Boston where the college team will be running their regional race.  Jenn Donnovan, the famous Suffolk distance runner during my time and one of Rob's old running crushes, will be racing.  Sure, she runs 16 minutes now, but at least I know she will drag the race along fast, so I can come home with a happy PR.  Boston has a lot of demons for me.  I've never run well there.  In fact, even when I warm up or do a practice run with the team before the regional race each year, I still have such bad memories and, yes, regrets. 

This weekend, I will be able to battle those demons.  Actually, I know I won't even feel those demons as I blaze through the course.  Realistically, can I win? Probably not, but I am going to fly on through faster than ever.  I hope that my splits are off; I will know that I am running faster than I had even hoped.

I actually texted one of my athletes, a Harry Potter fan, today.  I told her that her inspirational word should be "patronous," which she corrected, as the HP nerd she is, "Expecto Patronom!" In this one magical episode, Harry learns this spell to combat the dementors, the demons that suck the life (and happiness) out of everyone.  Angela lets dementors get to her, as I have done too, just as Harry seems to be especially weak to them.  In the story, Harry doesn't create a powerful patronus until he realizes that he has already made one in his past (after a weird magical time twist occurs).  Looking back now, these dementors are nothing, since I know I have shooed them away before and will do it again.